Part 5: Bridging the Gap: Supports for Gold Star Families and Other Survivors
By Rachel M. Sasser, DNP, CRNP, PMHNP-BC, CNE & Shannon S. Layton, DNP, RN, LICSW-S, NEA-BC, CNL, CWCN, CNE
With deep respect for those who have borne the heaviest cost of service, this installment opens by honoring the spouses, partners, children, parents, and loved ones whose veteran gave their life in defense of the nation. Their grief is immeasurable, and their sacrifice is recognized in the distinguished designation Gold Star family. Our aim is to stand beside these families with practical, trustworthy guidance reflecting humility, steadiness, and care.
Gold Star families’ experiences extend beyond and are not the same as households navigating a deployment. Families of deployed service members shoulder significant worry and stress in the loved one’s absence. They too have unique needs deserving support; because their loved one is expected to return, they are recognized as Blue Star families. Naming this difference is a way to offer each group the specific respect and assistance they need. Always remember that there is a large chance that the stress of lengthy deployment and time as a Blue Star Family could be compounding the experience of a Gold Star Family.
This clarity is essential in rural practice. More than one quarter of U.S. veterans, about 4,235,821 people, live in rural communities, and in many nurses are the first and sometimes the only trusted health professionals that a veteran’s family or care partner turns to during illness, transition, or bereavement (U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, n.d.). Because of the number of rural veterans, rural loss of veterans is proportionate (Curtis and Payne, 2010). Using compassionate language and precise terms helps rural nurses match the right support to the right family at the right time. Paying special attention to the unique challenges this population faces, this fourth installment of Bridging the Gap focuses on practical support for spouses, partners, families and other caregivers who are a vital part of the social support network for America’s rural veterans.
Sensitive Identification and Referral
After a service-connected death, survivors may present with insomnia, anxiety, appetite changes, physical stress symptoms, or a sudden loss of social support. They may not be aware of any survivor benefits. Using a trauma-informed approach with survivors is helpful to address potential needs: “Some families don’t realize there are survivor supports that can help with coverage and finances. Would it be okay if I shared a few options and connected you with someone who can help?” When feasible, arrange a same-day connection to an accredited VSO or the VA benefits line U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, 2025b, U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, 2026). See Table 1 for more information.
DoD Casualty Assistance Program (CAO/CACO)
After the death (or missing status) of a service member, a Casualty Assistance Officer (called a CAO/CACO depending on branch) is assigned to the primary next of kin to provide support. Rural nurses can ensure families have been assigned one and have the correct contact information, as the Casualty Assistance Officer helps with many short- and long-term benefits.
- How to contact: https://www.militaryonesource.mil/casualty-mortuary-affairs/
Dependency and Indemnity Compensation (DIC) and Survivors Pension
DIC is a monthly benefit paid to eligible survivors when a service member died in the line of duty or a veteran’s death was related to a service-connected condition (U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, 2025d). Nurses can help families by emphasizing that timely application and complete documentation are key. Survivors Pension is a separate, needs-based benefit for some low-income survivors and is worth screening for in assessments (U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, 2026).
- How to contact: DIC: https://www.va.gov/family-and-caregiver-benefits/survivor-compensation/dependency-indemnity-compensation/
- Survivors Pension: https://www.va.gov/family-and-caregiver-benefits/survivor-compensation/survivors-pension/
- For benefits help: 800-827-1000.
Fry Scholarship and Dependents’ Educational Assistance (DEA)
Survivors may qualify for educational assistance from either the Fry Scholarship or DEA (U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, 2025a; U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, 2025c). Nurses should encourage comparison first because once a spouse elects one benefit, VA rules limit switching later. When possible, route families to a VSO or the GI Bill hotline to compare scenarios before submitting the election.
- How to contact: DEA: https://www.va.gov/education/survivor-dependent-benefits/dependents-education-assistance/
- Fry Scholarship: https://www.va.gov/family-and-caregiver-benefits/education-and-careers/fry-scholarship/
- GI Bill hotline: 888-442-4551.
Burial, Memorial, and Pre-Need Planning
Gold Star Families have earned the right to be buried alongside the Veteran. Pre-need planning can reduce future burden by confirming eligibility for burial in a VA national cemetery and helping families understand available memorial items and honors (U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, 2025e). Eligible spouses and dependent children may be pre-registered at no cost for future interment.
- How to contact: https://www.va.gov/burials-memorials/pre-need-eligibility/
Free National Park Access for Gold Star Families (and Many Veterans)
The National Park Service offers free access options for Gold Star Families and for many veterans (National Park Service, 2026).
- How to contact: https://www.nps.gov/planyourvisit/passes.htm
Tips for Rural Nurse Management
When caregiver strain or bereavement disrupts a rural veteran household, the nursing priorities are to (1) screen and triage for safety, including risk for substance use and grief/mental health symptoms; (2) use telehealth-first pathways when travel is a barrier; (3) coordinate travel/lodging supports before appointments are missed; (4) complete warm handoffs to the Caregiver Support Program, Vet Centers, or accredited VSOs; and (5) schedule a 7–14 day follow-up to confirm benefits applications, counseling linkage, and basic-needs stability. The term 'warm handoff' refers to personally connecting a veteran or Gold Star family member with another service, rather than simply handing them a phone number or referral sheet. This ensures they receive the care and support they truly need.
References
Curtis, K. J., & Payne, C. F. (2010). The differential impact of mortality of American troops in the Iraq War: The non-metropolitan dimension. Demographic Research, 23(2), 41-62.https://doi.org/10.4054/DemRes.2010.23.2
National Park Service. (2026, January 1). Plan your visit. https://www.nps.gov/planyourvisit/veterans-and-gold-star-families-free-access.htm
U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. (n.d.). VA caregiver support program.https://www.caregiver.va.gov/
U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. (2025a, June 17). Fry scholarship. https://www.va.gov/family-and-caregiver-benefits/education-and-careers/fry-scholarship/
U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. (2025b, June 17). Get help from a VSO accredited representative or VSO. https://www.va.gov/get-help-from-accredited-representative/
U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. (2025c, December 18). Survivors' and dependents' educational assistance. https://www.va.gov/family-and-caregiver-benefits/education-and-careers/dependents-education-assistance/
U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. (2025d, December 19). About VA DIC for spouses, dependents, and parents. https://www.va.gov/family-and-caregiver-benefits/survivor-compensation/dependency-indemnity-compensation/
U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. (2025e, December 20). Pre-need eligibility for burial in a VA cemetery. https://www.va.gov/burials-memorials/pre-need-eligibility/
U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. (2026, January 14). Survivors pension. https://www.va.gov/family-and-caregiver-benefits/survivor-compensation/survivors-pension/
